Quick Q&A: Lonneke Bakker
As soon as you're a mom, we consider you an expert at being one. And as we feel women are best when they help and support each other, we love to collect tips, tricks & life hacks, from one mom to another mom (to be). Here's a quick Q&A with a familiar face on our website: LONNEKE BAKKER (25), mom of ZOLA (10 months) and one of our beautiful Atelier Melon models.
“'The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read: (And Your Children Will Be Glad That You Did)' by Philippa Perry."
First thing I do when I wake up
“Zola sleeps in our room. In the morning we take her in bed with us to cuddle and wake up together. Our dog Ziggy loves to join, very cosy."
Best travel destination with a baby
“We went to Curaçao with Zola twice, and it was great. Zola loved the warmth, the sea breeze in her face, spending all day in just her diaper. You could tell from her little face that she was enjoying it so much. We loved it, too. A different beach every day, hours of relaxing in the shade, nice diners in the evening."
Ultimate date night
"Dropping Zola of at her grandparents and going out for diner, or just spending an evening together. Also a very good way to get some intimacy back in the relationship."
"THE BEST GIFT AFTER GIVING BIRTH? FOOD!"
Must-have when in labor
“I brought a music box with me. A friend sent me a link to a YouTube movie with 40 minutes of mantra music. It was on repeat for 10 hours, and it brought me in some kind of trip. If I listen to that music now, it brings me to tears, that's how deep those emotions go. I would do exactly the same if I'm going to give birth ever again."
Best gift after giving birth
“The best gift was food! And one of those beautiful salt lamps, very useful when feeding at night."
“During the first 3 months, Zola only wanted to sleep in the baby carrier. She didn't like to be in the stroller at all. Thanks to the carrier, I at least had my hands free. And to be honest, I liked having her so close to me after nine months of pregnancy. My back didn't like it as much, though."
“I bought way too many cute baby dresses in size 50/56. She mostly wore a onesie."
Things I do for me
“I like going outside with my cruise board, get a coffee to go, visit some shops, look for inspiration for our future family home. But sometimes I just want to sit on the couch with coffee and a book, or watch a television show I normally never watch."
Just don't ask
“When I was pregnant, random strangers asked me if I was planning on breastfeeding. I never understood why people would ask that. They're my breasts, and it's my baby. Breastfeeding didn't work that well for us; I produced a lot of milk, but Zola didn't manage to latch on well. After 2 months, I switched to formula. As if that means that I don't want the best for my baby? As if I'm failing if I don't manage to breastfeed for longer? Dear future moms, just do what makes you happy, because that's what will make your baby happy. As long as your baby is growing well, just remember that it's your choice. Don't listen to anyone who tells you otherwise."
Advice I didn't ask for
“I remember being outside with Zola in the carrier when she was still very young. An elderly lady came to me, asking me why Zola wasn't wearing a hat, since she felt it was too cold for a baby to be out without one. She probably meant well, but as a new mom you really don't need comments like that making you doubt your choices."
"TO ME, IMPERFECTION IS THE ROAD TO HAPPINESS."
Motherhood in 3 words
“Self-reflection, messy, beautiful."
Most surprising about motherhood
“I never expected to feel so insecure about things. The biggest lesson it taught me was not to ask too many different people for advice, because everybody says something else. And also: don't look everything up on the internet. Follow your gut feeling, listen to your child. And if you need medical advice, ask a doctor or a lactation consultant, for example."
“My personal development is on the fast track ever since I'm a mom. I want to do everything perfectly for my daughter, my loved ones, myself. But perfectionism does not make you happy. To me, imperfection, trying and failing are the road to happiness. And another life lesson: time is limited, spend it only with those who have your heart - quality over quantity."
Best tip for partners
"As a new mom, you can feel insecure, but as a new dad too. Let the other person make their own mistakes, don't be a know-it-all. Accept that your partner does things differently. And if your partner corrects you on a small, silly thing, just say: 'Honey, this is my way of doing it, tomorrow you can do it your way.' Also giving myself a piece of advice by saying this, haha."
My best tip
“No advice, just a big hug. Keep on going. You're doing great, mommy!"